Today is Valentine’s Day and ok, it has probably turned into something very commercial and tacky but let’s not lose sight of the underlying message, which is all about love. Life can be tough at times, so what’s wrong with a day that celebrates something nice like love even if it has been hijacked by commercial interests.

Kind of on the subject of romance, last night I was a bit wrecked so I sat down in front of the tv and watched “You’ve Got Mail.” For some reason, I really like romantic comedies; maybe I’m just a sucker for the inevitable happy ending. Anyway, what could be better than sitting in front of the tv enjoying something funny that makes you laugh out loud and feel good? Well, maybe one thing I suppose... to shamelessly paraphrase Jack... watching it with someone who makes you want to be a better man.

Valentine's Day You’ve Got Mail Romantic Comedies

Labels: Events

I was djing (is that even a fecking verb) at a house party over the weekend. X-A hooked us up with a decent set of speakers so the sound was booming. I started off by playing a pretty nifty (in my humble opinion) two and a half hour house set, which was absolutely fabulous. The only problem was that everyone at the frigging party wouldn’t recognise a decent dance toon even if it came at them sneakily from behind and bit the arse off them (for an interesting discussion about asses, check out this amusing post by Betty the Sheep), that is of course except for you Snow Girl, you’re the only one that truly understands me, sniff, sniff. So eventually, after a sound thrashing administered by Bat Girl, which was kind of nice for all of the wrong reasons, I relented and acquiesced to the wishes of the masses. Ya, I know, there’s just no accounting for taste!

Fortunately, I had no Abba tunes - there are some lines I just won’t cross - so Peaches was still extremely upset and spent the entire night repeatedly muttering the immortal phrase “he’s a lovely guy (so true :-) but the worst DJ in the world ever!” Don’t worry, under that veneer of a cold-hearted bitch that she wears so proudly, she really is a peach. Not sure if she’s right about me being a strawberry but I’m gonna roll with it for the moment. So, after a few crowd friendly tunes such as “Flame” by Bell XI (for Bat Girl) and “Crazy” by Gnarls Barkley (for Snow Girl) and a few crowd unfriendly tunes like “Root Down” by the Beastie Boys (for Game Girl), people briefly got off their derrières and actually danced for a while. Still, that didn’t last long and DJ was still severely distraught over the lack of any Wolf Tones or Metallica tracks. Ah well, you can’t please everyone!

After that brief spell of joyfulness, things progressively descended into madness and I was haphazardly training in new DJ’s so that I could do some dancing myself. Strangely enough, you give a person a set of headphones and they just don’t seem to want to give them back, this enraptured look of concentration comes over them and they start banging out the beats. Special mentions to DJ Celine, DJ Doc, DJ Wonder Bra Girl, DJ Ronan Keating (if only because he was so bad he made us laugh :-) and to DJ Stoned Girl, who was (allegedly) so stoned out of her head that she thought it was totally frigging hilarious to just keep repeatedly playing “Flame” over and over and over and over again... I wonder if she got those photos we put on her phone when we went through her bag before she dropped in to collect it the following day.

Anyway, it was a good night and I particularly enjoyed Wonder Bra Girl’s story about her wonder bras that seemed to be severely lacking in the wonder department, I think Bat Girl christened them disillusionment bras. Beats me why she thought she needed them in the first place. (Damn, I said that out loud, didn’t I!) Still, she was undoubtedly proud of them all the same if the amount of times she fondled them in the kitchen just to piss off Ronan Keating is anything to go by. By that stage, I was beginning to think they’d never get in that frigging taxi because they really needed to get a fecking room!

Finally, a special shout out to Rat Girl, who couldn’t go because she was puking her guts out from food poisoning, and on her birthday and all, that is sad isn’t it. Also, I’m looking forward to seeing Doc’s photos when he eventually gets off his ass and sorts them out.

PS: For a more unbiased review of this event, check out this post by Betty the Sheep.

Labels: DJs, Events, House, Humour

Upon reading Knackered Kaz’s Valentine’s Day rant on her blog, I started thinking that something had to be done. So I thought about it for a while and this is what I’ve concluded.

The fundamental problem is that Valentines Day is a day for couples and there is no corresponding day for singles! So I reckoned that if Saint Valentine is the patron saint of lovers then all that I needed to do was Google the patron saint of singles, sheer fecking brilliance I thought to myself. Unfortunately, things turned out to be a little more complicated than I had first thought.

It turns out that Saint Benedict Joseph Labré (there's more than one Saint Benedict by the way) is the patron saint of single men and that Saint Agatha is the patron saint of single women, those wonderful Catholics and their zany saints. At first I thought about instigating a Saint Agatha & Saint Benedict’s Day but then I cunningly decided that it was time for all long suffering singles everywhere to get one up on their coupled brothers and sisters. Subsequently, I’ve elected that two separate days should be created for singles, one for each saint.

As luck would have it, both of these saints already have their own day, which saves me the trouble of picking them. Saint Agatha’s Day is on the 5th February and Saint Benedict’s Feastday is on the 16th April.

Now all I have to do is figure out how these two days will actually work in practice. Do you buy yourself a nice gift? Do you randomly buy stuff for other singles that you know? Do you decide to take yourself or other singles out to dinner? Damned if I know! However, I do know that there are a lot of smart people out there who could probably work it all out for me. Answers on a postcard please...

(Thanks to Funtime Sindy for the picture.)

Labels: Events, Humour